When both my parents and mother-in-law died within 20 months, everyone wanted to help. Yet I wasn't ready to receive. Here are 8 ways to help that supported me until I was ready for me.
Category: Mourning Papa
It’s Been Weeks Since I Wrote ‘bout My Dad
A poem providing insight into mourning during the in-between times.
Don’t Wait: Lessons from My Father-in-Law Murray November
Don't Wait: Lessons from my father-in-law Murray Novembert. (Yom Kippur sermon)
You Won’t Be There these High Holy Days
A poem about facing the moments over the High Holy Days - small but meaningful - when my dad won't be there.
Lazy Mourning Morning
A poem about those moments when I'm not feeling the sadness in the midst of the mourning.
A Friend’s Shiva Visit
Poem about when a friend visited me during my dad's shiva.
Standing for Kaddish That First Time
Standing for Kaddish that first time is surreal. This poem captures the multitude of feelings as I stood in temple to recite Kaddish for my father Ken Kipnes.
I Guess. I am. Still. a Mourner. (Thirty days since Dad Died)
I am still a mourner. A poem about how my body - tears, trembling shoulders, welling up of emotions - remind me that I am still a mourner. Remembering my father, Ken Kipnes.
Seeking a Minyan in Disneyland (or) Kaddish In a Small World
Where do I find a minyan in Disneyland when I need to say Kaddish for my father? Outside It’s a Small World, after all! There, my students ensured I had a community for Kaddish.
Low Level Sadness, the Mourning Heart’s Guest
Low level sadness, right beneath the surface, is the constant guest in the heart and mind of the mourner. This poem reflects those feelings during shloshim for my father, Ken Kipnes, Papa.
Shloshim’s Theological Wanderings (or) Asking the Questions I’m Not Ready to Ask
A spoken word poem about the theological questions that arise after the death of a loved one. Written as I think about my father Ken Kipnes.
Video: What’s Mourning Like?
A video that explores what it feels like to be a mourner, featuring my poem - The Secret Life of a Mourner.
Video: What to Say to a Mourner
A video that explores what to say to a mourner. Of particular significance for me since my father Ken Kipnes died.
5 Extra Minutes During Shloshim (An Ode to Not Shaving)
A poem about my experience as a mourner following the ritual of not shaving during Shloshim.
The Secret Life of the Mourner
A poem about what a mourner experiences, hidden away from the rest of the world, sometimes hidden even from friends or community members